What does it take for you to want to end your life? How much is too much; until you can’t take anymore? Well, all four kids in Crash into Me by Albert Borris have crossed the lines of life. Owen, the main character, and Jin-Ae meet in a hospital for the mentally unstable, upon being released Jin-Ae welcomes Owen to a suicide chat room. There he meets Frank and Audrey, each has failed at suicide, and they all have one thing in common; they all want to die. They decide to meet and drive across the country on a suicide road trip and at the end they will kill themselves. But will they discover if life’s worth living in the process?
Owen is a quiet, endearing sixteen year old who has attempted suicide time after time. He knows everything about suicide, including facts and statistics, and is a human computer. With his laptop he singlehandedly navigates the group through the journey. The only thing though is that he doesn’t speak, especially about why he wants to die. But it’s revealed that he wants to die because he did something terrible, and blames himself for the consequences. He is supposed to be on a collage road trip, so he always has to contact his overprotecting mother. If only she knew. . .
Jin-Ae is an Asian girl friend of Owen’s. They live =in the same town and I believe they go to school together, and they also share a visit to an insane hospital. Jin-Ae is very open about her being a lesbian and even tries to convert the others at times. She’s ashamed by her sexuality and thinks her parents will reject her if they knew. So the way out, she sees, is to die. She convinced her parents she’s on a road trip with Owen, looking at collages. Frank is the sports-obsessed, over-achieving driver. He is never good enough for his controlling father and hates how he’s becoming his father. He wants to play sports, but he’s no good at them. He still takes the group to sports arenas anyway, just to live out the dream before he dies.
Audrey is such a character. In her most recent attempts at suicide, she first jumped off her roof and broke her legs. Then she decided to smash her head with a frying pan, until she went unconscious. Because of this, she had to shave her head and has a huge scar on her forehead. She is obsessed with the band Nirvana (a very good band), and her last wish is to visit Seattle and see Kurt Cobain’s apartment. It’s never revealed why she wants to die, other than her jerk boyfriend broke up with her, but to me that’s not a good enough reason. Not for her, at least, because she is so lively, I just can’t imagine her really wanting to die. Especially now that she is interested in one of the group members and things heat up quickly.
In this novel there is lots of secrets, bucket lists, making out, sharpie tattoos, gay bingo, hilarious ways to die and four teens on a journey to find life and death. It is a sharp read, sometimes a little hard because it’s so raw and hard hitting. It’s an exceptional story; i am only half way through; but it takes my vote for a great read. It makes you think about the little things in life you love but take for granted. You can’t see what’s in front of you until someone shows you, and then you can love it like you should have always. A great book so far and a powerful story.
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